记二舅In Memory of My UncleПамяти дяди

2026年9月15日，我的二舅去世了。Пусть земля ему будет пухом。On September 15, 2026, my uncle passed away.undefined

*Пусть земля ему будет пухом.*undefined

收到这个消息时我们全家都感到十分愕然，昨日母亲还在与他打电话聊家常，生命就那样戛然而止。我的情绪非常复杂，唯有写作能够疏解胸口的忿懑。When we received the news, my whole family was stunned. Only the day before, my mother had been talking with him on the phone about ordinary, everyday things. And then, just like that, his life came to an abrupt end.undefined

我的情绪非常复杂，唯有写作能够疏解胸口的忿懑。My feelings were complicated. Writing seemed to be the only way to ease the anger and resentment sitting heavily in my chest.undefined

没错，是忿懑。Yes. Resentment.undefined

如若亲人因大病住院，你总会有过这样那样的设想。但他平日就如同每一个普通的往常日子一样，简单得就像广州的梅雨季，因潮湿引起的腐烂不会让你有任何的怀疑与警惕。When someone you love has been seriously ill or hospitalized, you have probably imagined, in one way or another, what might happen. But he had been living his life as he always did, through one ordinary day after another. It was like Guangzhou during the plum rain season: everything looks familiar, while the dampness quietly sets decay in motion, giving you no reason to suspect that anything is wrong.undefined

我试着写下印象中的二舅，缅怀他的过往。但我发现，我很难从记忆中将他完整地拼凑出来。I tried to write down what I remembered of my uncle, to piece together something of his life in remembrance. But I soon realized how difficult it was to reconstruct a whole person from memory.undefined

我一年中总有那么几个时刻，想单独“采访”我的父母，将他们完整的前半生用文字刻画出来。Several times a year, I find myself wanting to sit down with my parents and “interview” them, to record the first half of their lives in words.undefined

想当年没有影像，他们也不识字，所有的故事都仅仅停留在同辈或长辈的记忆中。也许是因为经历过战争与死亡，这样的想法越发强烈。There were few photographs back then, and they never learned to read or write. Their stories survive almost entirely in the memories of people from their generation and those who came before them. Perhaps having lived through war and death has made this impulse stronger in me.undefined

我越来越想通过文字、影像或创作，去记录自己的人生和他人的人生，因为这是对抗死亡与虚无的方式。More and more, I want to use words, images, and other forms of creation to document my own life and the lives of others, as a way of resisting death and oblivion.undefined

可是，我的二舅没有等到我实际行动的时刻，他已不在人间。But my uncle did not wait for me to finally act on that impulse.undefined

他已不在人间。He is no longer here.undefined

我的二舅，是一个非常普通的50后，普通得几乎没有人记得他。My uncle was a very ordinary man born in the 1950s, so ordinary that almost no one would remember him.undefined

可他似乎又有点“精神”或“智商”与常人不太一样，因为他总是像一个孩子一样学舌，你说一句，他就重复一句。And yet there was something about him that was different from most people. In some ways, he always seemed like a child. He loved to echo what other people said. You would say something, and he would repeat it after you.undefined

我们唯一记得的是他的口头禅。当他逗你玩的时候，总是嬉皮笑脸地问你：What we remember most clearly is his favorite little routine.undefined

当他逗你玩的时候，总是嬉皮笑脸地问你：Whenever he was teasing you, he would grin and ask:undefined

“嘿嘿，你是不是想要？你是不是想要？”“Hey, hey, do you want it? Do you want it?”undefined

当你回答“想要”，他就说：“想要啊，想要不给你。”If you said yes, he would reply: “You want it? Well, I’m not giving it to you.”undefined

当你回答“不想要”，他就说：“不要就没办法嘛。”If you said no, he would say: “Well, if you don’t want it, there’s nothing I can do.”undefined

这似乎代表了他的一切学识水平，当然，也代表了他的人生态度。That little exchange seemed to contain almost everything he knew how to say. And, in a way, perhaps it also contained his entire attitude toward life.undefined

他的妈妈，我的外婆，在他很小的时候便去世了。他从小就跟着爸爸，我的外公长大。His mother, my grandmother, died when he was very young. He grew up following his father, my grandfather, everywhere.undefined

因为“傻傻的”，他从小就跟着外公到盐田里晒盐。Because he was a little “simple,” he went with my grandfather to work in the salt fields from an early age.undefined

也正是因为这样，他成了家族内唯一有养老金的50后。And because of that, somewhat unexpectedly, he became the only person of his generation in our family to receive a pension.undefined

他从未结过婚，也无儿无女。He never married and had no children.undefined

年轻时，别人总称他“老光棍”；年纪大时，反倒成了被羡慕的对象。When he was young, people called him an “old bachelor.” When he grew older, strangely enough, people began to envy him instead.undefined

每天光着膀子，漫无目的地走在大街上，他的脸上和身上都遗留着在盐田被红日拷打的痕迹，好不风光和潇洒。Every day, he wandered the streets bare-chested and seemingly without anywhere in particular to go. His face and body still carried the marks of years spent beneath the punishing sun of the salt fields. There was something almost carefree, even magnificent, about the way he lived.undefined

而在他生命最后的一刻，也没有亲人在身边。And yet, at the final moment of his life, no family member was by his side.undefined

若你觉得他孤单可怜，他会拿出他用养老金新买的最新版手机向你炫耀（当然，也是被人觊觎着养老金骗着买的）。If you thought that made him lonely or pitiful, he might have pulled out the latest smartphone he had bought with his pension and proudly shown it off to you.undefined

（当然，也是被人觊觎着养老金骗着买的）。(Of course, someone had probably noticed his pension and talked him into buying it.)undefined

事实上，我从来没有见过他流露过对生活的不满。The truth is, I never once saw him express dissatisfaction with his life.undefined

好像他每日的闲散日子已经撑满了他所有的精神空间。他总是看起来非常满足，一个未长大过的孩子。It was as though the idle rhythm of his days filled the entirety of his inner world. He always seemed content. A child who had somehow never grown up.undefined

我感到非常惭愧和难过，因为我不知道他今年几岁，且我全部的记忆竟然无法拼凑出一篇文章，无论我如何拼命地想，也只剩下他光着膀子走在街上的背影。I feel deeply ashamed and saddened that I do not even know how old he was this year. Worse still, all the memories I have of him are not enough to piece together a complete story. No matter how hard I try to remember, what remains is the image of his bare back as he walked down the street.undefined

我与二舅的关系就像萍水相逢的陌生人，但他的突然离世给我的冲击，就像伊以战争中那位与我同龄的女孩去世，给我的冲击一样强烈。My relationship with my uncle was almost like that of two strangers who happened to cross paths. And yet his sudden death struck me with the same force as the death of a woman my age during the Israel-Iran war.undefined

我们从来没有很亲近，但我却感到无比亲近。We had never been close. And yet, suddenly, I felt unbearably close to him.undefined

我们总要借由另一个人的离去，才会突然触碰到那些平日不愿触碰的东西。Perhaps it is only through another person’s death that we are forced to touch the things we usually avoid touching.undefined

关于父母，关于自己，关于时间，也关于一个人终究会从世界上消失这件事。Our parents. Ourselves. Time. And the fact that one day, a person can simply disappear from this world.undefined

胸口发闷持续了一整天。The heaviness in my chest lasted the entire day.undefined

没有痛哭，甚至谈不上悲伤，是一种非常复杂的心情，复杂到我暂时不想去谈论它，不想让我这不值一文的思绪遮挡住舅舅唯一给我留下的记忆。I did not sob. I am not even sure I could call what I felt sadness. It was something far more complicated, so complicated that, for now, I do not want to talk about it. I do not want my own insignificant thoughts to obscure the few memories my uncle left me.undefined

我想起《寻梦环游记》，点开《Remember Me》这首歌开始循环播放：I thought of *Coco* and began playing *Remember Me* on repeat.undefined

舅舅Uncle,undefined

May your memory be a blessing.*May your memory be a blessing.*undefined

一滴眼泪滴了下来。A single tear fell.undefined

——写于2026年9月16日 00:30— Written at 12:30 a.m., September 16, 2026undefined